Many clients and friends have been asking about our adoption lately.  I plan to post the story of how we came to where we are today over the next few weeks.  But first I want to share this story from last night.  It is fresh in my mind and I have felt prompted all day to share it so maybe someone out there needs to hear it.

Last night I was sitting at my computer stressing about the financial part of our adoption.  I could feel my unbelief in God’s ability to provide for us sneaking in and starting to consume me. I began to read scripture to give my spirit peace.  That was when I came across Mark 9.  I came to the Mark 9:14-29.  It’s the story where the father asks for the demon to be cast out of his son.  I started to read and God struck me with this part of the story (part of vs 22-24):

22……..Have mercy on us and help us, if you can.” “What do you mean, ‘If I can’?” Jesus asked. “Anything is possible if a person believes.” The father instantly cried out, “I do believe, but help me overcome my unbelief!”

I found myself stopping and saying.. Anything God???  Then I reread it and the word ANYTHING kept jumping off the page at me.  (I even in my doubt checked other versions and translations) ANYTHING or the words “ALL THINGS” kept appearing.  Even the 29,000 dollars we will need for our adoption, not to mention the 10,000 in flight expenses and did I mention in country costs of staying there for 13-15 days…  LORD help my unbelief!!!!!  I know in my heart and in my spirit that a 40,000 dollar adoption bill isn’t too big for God but why does my spirit doubt and wrestle with God?  Surely, a God who created the world, gave me breath, heals the sick, cares for the orphaned, the widowed, the poor, and the birds of the air can handle this!  God has proven to be so faithful through this adoption process.  Soooooo Faithful!!!!  Every time we have needed to make a payment for this process HE has provided  (More on this story in my next blog posts).  Every time we have wondered if this was the direction we were supposed to go in, He has confirmed it. Every time things looked impossible He made it possible!

I continued reading the passage and  I began to read vs. 29.
The disciples ask why they couldn’t cast out the evil sprit and Jesus’s response:

29 Jesus replied, “This kind can be cast out only by prayer.”

I did some research on this passage and read some commentaries and came to a Commentary by Gracepoint that said this:

“This prayer that Jesus has in mind is ‘not merely a pious exercise,’ rather it is ‘the sense of COMPLETE dependence on God from which sincere prayer springs.’  It makes one receptive to the action of God.  One cannot get ready for the moment by quickly uttering a special prayer; one has to be ready through a prayerful life when the moment comes.”  

Last night I was reminded that I need to be completely dependent on Him, in constant prayer, and constantly asking Him to rid me of my unbelief and continue trust Him for everything so that I might not boast of being able to do things for myself but that in the end HE will receive all the glory.

So thankful for the many things I have been learning through this adoption process!  And believe me it’s a process.   A process of breaking me and molding me into the person God wants me to be.  It’s not easy and so far the journey has been rough, (more on that later) however, I am confident when we are at the end of the journey and we are finally holding our babies in our arms it will all be worth it!   Especially knowing that while we am holding them our God will be holding us!

Thanks for allowing me to share, and for reading!  Blessings on this beautiful spring day!